You don't have to make him quit. You have to be able to see.
Many of the people who contact a helpline are partners and mothers. The advice ends everywhere at “put him on self-exclusion”. This page starts where the advice ends: what you can see yourself, what to say instead of “quit”, and what to do the day the pause ends.
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See the real number yourself
Not his estimate and not yours. Three places where the number lives:
- Three months of bank statements and instant-payment history. Deposits to operators carry their names.
- The debt register: have claims or new loans appeared in his name?
- Most banks offer a gambling block. He turns it on himself in the app; ask whether it is on, not whether he gambles.
The day after
The accounts work again. Don't ask “did you gamble?”. Ask “what amount did you decide before?”. That is the question the plan is built on, and the only one that can be answered honestly.
Your own limits
You decide what you pay, what you want to know, and when you need to talk to someone who is not him. The helplines are for you too.